[ This video is also easy to watch. It's the same as the last where it's largely based in experiences that Jack simply doesn't share, and he doesn't feel much of anything over. As a younger man, he might have felt a pang of something over the idea that someone's parents would actually give enough of a shit over their kid to fund expensive cybernetics, but that had been squashed as Jack had gotten older and watched Angel grow up. So by now, hearing about that kind of thing comes with as much dispassionate distance as if Jack were reading a technical report.
It's only that last part that gets any kind of reaction out of Jack beyond that, but this too isn't anger or really... very much at all, at least outwardly.
He can piece together a general story of what happened through these videos and from thinking back on things Rhys had said, but there are still details that escape him. Hearing the anxiety in Rhys's voice, he's pretty sure about one thing that he had been wondering, at least. Rhys removed all of those cybernetics that Jack had known himself, hadn't he? He would've had to, because Jack knows himself. As soon as the Rhys would have fucked him over, he knows he would have taken over those cybernetics to really make him suffer. It's obvious. So it's obvious Rhys would have to get rid of them, and quickly.
But there's a detail that he lingers on, and that's the fact that Rhys hadn't destroyed the eye. He hadn't destroyed him. These stupid data files about everyone here made that clear, but it's a detail that Jack finds confusing. After all, if the situations were reversed, he wouldn't have done the same. Hell, he had decided that after he was done getting info from this drive, he was going to nuke it. It was a final "fuck you," because Jack still didn't feel satisfied with how he had killed Rhys. It was so lacking, because he truly wanted Rhys to know how deeply that betrayal cut, but he didn't have the chance. Rhys may have been a liar, but killing him like a bandit-- It didn't feel right.
So, why would Rhys keep the drive?
Rhys sure as hell seemed to think that Jack had betrayed him, and Rhys wasn't an idiot when it came to tech at least. He knew that the eye was what stored Jack and all he was. Jack had even said as much here to make that clear, because even though he had expressed it aggressively, he was afraid of the idea of Rhys having that eye in that form. It was like someone holding his beating heart in their hand, and he couldn't help but think that it was only a moment away from being crushed. Maybe it didn't matter now with whatever form Alice had given him, but it never made him any more comfortable.
Though a thought occurs to him, and Jack frowns as he considers it. Because maybe Rhys did know that. Maybe he got it, just how empty and desolate that place was. That was the weirdest part about it. It was a place, and it wasn't. He couldn't describe it, because in all of the memories and experiences he objectively knew weren't his at all, there was nothing like it. It was a true nothingness, and absence of anything but himself. There was nothing physical, nothing discernible, and not even time in any way that he could perceive normally. It was just desperately waiting to flicker back into what felt like existence, and it was a place Jack never, ever wanted to return to. He's sure that if it existed, Hell would be a better place than the drive, because at least there, he wouldn't be so utterly alone.
Yeah, he decides. That has to be it.
The idea that Rhys wanted Jack to suffer was all that made sense to him.
Jack leans forward to bring up the next video without ever really visisbly responding to this one. ]
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momijizukamori
no subject
Date: 2016-08-12 03:36 pm (UTC)It's only that last part that gets any kind of reaction out of Jack beyond that, but this too isn't anger or really... very much at all, at least outwardly.
He can piece together a general story of what happened through these videos and from thinking back on things Rhys had said, but there are still details that escape him. Hearing the anxiety in Rhys's voice, he's pretty sure about one thing that he had been wondering, at least. Rhys removed all of those cybernetics that Jack had known himself, hadn't he? He would've had to, because Jack knows himself. As soon as the Rhys would have fucked him over, he knows he would have taken over those cybernetics to really make him suffer. It's obvious. So it's obvious Rhys would have to get rid of them, and quickly.
But there's a detail that he lingers on, and that's the fact that Rhys hadn't destroyed the eye. He hadn't destroyed him. These stupid data files about everyone here made that clear, but it's a detail that Jack finds confusing. After all, if the situations were reversed, he wouldn't have done the same. Hell, he had decided that after he was done getting info from this drive, he was going to nuke it. It was a final "fuck you," because Jack still didn't feel satisfied with how he had killed Rhys. It was so lacking, because he truly wanted Rhys to know how deeply that betrayal cut, but he didn't have the chance. Rhys may have been a liar, but killing him like a bandit-- It didn't feel right.
So, why would Rhys keep the drive?
Rhys sure as hell seemed to think that Jack had betrayed him, and Rhys wasn't an idiot when it came to tech at least. He knew that the eye was what stored Jack and all he was. Jack had even said as much here to make that clear, because even though he had expressed it aggressively, he was afraid of the idea of Rhys having that eye in that form. It was like someone holding his beating heart in their hand, and he couldn't help but think that it was only a moment away from being crushed. Maybe it didn't matter now with whatever form Alice had given him, but it never made him any more comfortable.
Though a thought occurs to him, and Jack frowns as he considers it. Because maybe Rhys did know that. Maybe he got it, just how empty and desolate that place was. That was the weirdest part about it. It was a place, and it wasn't. He couldn't describe it, because in all of the memories and experiences he objectively knew weren't his at all, there was nothing like it. It was a true nothingness, and absence of anything but himself. There was nothing physical, nothing discernible, and not even time in any way that he could perceive normally. It was just desperately waiting to flicker back into what felt like existence, and it was a place Jack never, ever wanted to return to. He's sure that if it existed, Hell would be a better place than the drive, because at least there, he wouldn't be so utterly alone.
Yeah, he decides. That has to be it.
The idea that Rhys wanted Jack to suffer was all that made sense to him.
Jack leans forward to bring up the next video without ever really visisbly responding to this one. ]